King Herald

So, this Christmas I've decided that I'm going to make a King Herod pinata. I told my sister Carly that I was going to make it and she said, "That's right! You try and kill Baby Jesus, and we'll kill you!" And I said, "That's the Christmas spirit we're looking for!"

Because this time of the year is all about finding joy through exacting vengeance.

My BFF was supposed to come down and help me make it because, well, he's an expert in the field of creepy pinatas. Por ejemplo: He once went to the grocery store and took all the expired food that they'll give you for free and stuck it inside a pinata. And when people whacked it open they were greatly astonished to find an old bagel come flying out. Isn't that deliciously creepy?
I thought so, too, America. I thought so, too. But alas! I shall have to attempt this venture on my own. I feel like a Frodo... without a Sam.

Moving onward...
My family got talking about King Herod last night. This is the delicious conversation that ensued:
Ryleigh: Lauren's going to make a pinata of King Herald!

Me: HA! You mean King Herod.

Ryleigh: Yes. King Herod. Whatever.

Brandon: Jesus was no fan of King Herod. I mean he did behead his cousin John.

Ryleigh: Jesus beheaded someone?! That doesn't make sense!

Me: Yup! Thanks for baptizing me! (Whop!)

Ryleigh: Jesus wouldn't hurt a fly! He created flies! I mean... Heavenly Father did... I mean... (promptly leaves the room.)

The laughter that followed cannot be contained within this small blog...
... I don't think the vast expanse of cyberspace could hold the laughter that ensued.

Stick that in your oven, cyberspace!